My girlfriend and I got engaged approximately a year ago after a short courtship. I was comfortable proposing because we agreed on a long engagement. Soon after she developed a chronic condition. Although it's nothing serious, it has been an extremely heavy burden on our relationship. It has prevented us from moving forward with any wedding plans. I understand that she is suffering but so am I. Sometimes I even consider breaking it off. Is this unfair of me?
I don't think that your dating dilemma really stems from whether or not you will be unfair to your girlfriend if you leave her during her time of need; I think you are regretting the lost time in your engagement that you counted on to get to know her better, and I think you are also worried about public perception and how you may be viewed as cold-hearted. The truth is indeed, most people will feel that way, but this engagement is yours and not theirs.
I'm sorry you and your girlfriend are going through this. This is a good test for your relationship. If you can survive an obstacle like this, together you can overcome it all. So before you make your way to the closest exit, take a moment to consider why you proposed in the first place- has the characteristic you were most attracted to about her survived? Can you imagine living your life without her? If she were to make a miraculous recovery tomorrow, would you be overjoyed and continue your relationship? How would you feel if the situation was reversed- would you expect her to continue dating you? My best dating advice to you is to weigh the answer to each of these questions before you make any rash romantic decisions. I wish you good foresight and I wish her good health and may you both come up together on the other side stronger and more in love.
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